Ok. I give in.I can't do it all.
If you're anything like me each day is a battle against time to fit in as many tasks as a humanly possible. Then bedtime comes around and the guilt sets in...I didn't spend enough time on 4 year old's homework (he's in reception class...why is he getting homework?) , I didn't spend enough time playing with baby, dinner wasn't a culinary masterpiece, I didn't clean the bathroom, I didn't do any baking, the house is a mess, I can see dust everywhere ...on and on I get myself into frenzy. Add in the pile of kids birthday invitations to reply to, a massive pin board full of school events and charity functions, the endless birthdays to remember...it's no wonder I go to bed each night with a feeling of absolute panic. Oh and silly me...I run my own business too.Why do we do this to ourselves?? I know I'm not the only one who feels this way. Last weekend I decided to beat myself up about the fact I'm not making homemade meals for our 8 month old baby...I'm a bad mother I cried!!
Then there's the BIG one for me...why am I not slim? I've been battling with this particular issue for a while. I began putting on weight in my 30s which I hated but not surprising really - I was socialising (a lot) and the exercise had started to wane. I had both children late on - so after 2 major ops and 2 kids I ended up feeling very unhappy with my size.
But there I go again! Feeling bad about myself ...my rational side knows that yes maybe I need to make more of an effort. The irrational side tells me I need to be a size 10 NOW! Stupid, stupid, stupid. Even after all these years I still feel the pressure to look good, have a fabulous business, have 2 immaculately dressed, well-behaved children (dressed in Mini Boden obviously) and a show home house like something out of a Cath Kidston shoot.
Most days in my exhausted state I am more likely to put my pants on over my tights but I'm no superwoman despite being called that recently. I'm just muddling along like every other mum and dad with a job or business to run and kids to sort and a house to keep.
Well this week since it's half term and particularly difficult to keep juggling all those domestic balls - that niggling irrational side can take a running jump. The kids are happy, the meals are edible and the house looks fairly clean (if you don't look too closely). I've decided that my gorgeous little boys are not going to remember if the toilet was clean. What they will hopefully remember is a happy Mummy playing with them in the snow or painting pictures.
It's about time we all just stopped trying to be Superwoman...I for one am hanging up my cape.
